LITTLE LAMB

Its rare that I write about anything that isn't theater related and when I do its because its something that means a lot to me personally or its something that has struck a chord with me.  

Typically, I'm not one to became that wrapped up in complete stragers lives,  but the story of Madeline Alice Spohr is one that I won't soon forget.  

I don't remember how I became acquainted with the Spohr family, but I found out that they had a little girl named Maddie who wasn't well.  When children suffer, it breaks my heart.  Having not known anything about Maddie, I began reading her journey through her mother's blog.  Though this little girl had gone through a tremendous amount in her 17 months of life,  I was struck by how happy and full of life she looked.  Maddie had this incredible smile that just lit up a room -- and this my room...via photos through my computer!  I had never seen any child with such expressive eyes and such an infectious smile!  I remember coming home after a long and frustrating day at work (feeling particularly annoyed) and while reading about Maddie, saw this:

Seriously?  Are you kidding me?  I couldn't help but to smile right back at the screen!  Seeing her bright, shining face made me feel better and put a smile on my own face.  The crazy thing is that I didn't know her or her family.  Somehow though, I was compelled to continue reading and check up on her and her family.  This little girl was born 11 weeks premature and initially, it wasn't clear if she was going to survive.  Yet she did, for 17 months.  I was really pulling for Maddie and I wanted to know she was able to come home and would be ok.  When I found out she had passed away, I was heartbroken for her and her entire family.  I can't even imagine how they feel, but the Spohrs are trying to focus their energies into something positive in honor of their baby.

Maddie's mom, Heather wrote about what she and her husband are doing to help others and   this is why the March of Dimes is important to their family.  Per a recent post from Heather about some of their efforts:

I have tried to do some good through all of this. Tried to find some purpose, something to occupy my days and help Maddie’s name live on. I want her to be associated with wonderful things, and not the terrible sadness of her passing.

Parents for Preemies is a grassroots fundraiser where local establishments sell paper “baby blocks” to raise much needed funds for the March of Dimes. You can help by supporting your local retail businesses and organizations when they ask for a contribution for the March of Dimes - they’ll take as little as a dollar. Or, if you are really super motivated, you can pitch the campaign to your local establishments!

Thinking of Heather on this Mother's Day and donating in honor of Maddie.  My heart goes out to you!

OTHER PEOPLE'S STORIES

As a blog writer, I have to admit this whole thing feels a little self indulgent sometimes.  I write (predominantly) about theater and am always pleasantly surprised when people actually read this thing.  I mean, most people are not racing to read my blog (no offense taken) and those that do, are in perfect company with myself and the other big theatre geeks.  There are a lot of blogs out there that touch on not-so-important points, topics, issues, etc. but like mine, a lot aren't really filled with amazing writing.  Yet, when I stumbled upon Matt Logelin's blog recently, I discovered something pretty darned amazing (his story is so heartbreaking and I couldn't begin to do it justice, so if you are so inclined, you can read about his story here first or the feature written in the Star Tribune).

From the day I first heard of Matt and his story, I was rivited.  I sat and read the entire blog from "cover to cover".  His story made me (mostly) cry but I also laughed and my heart ached for this new family.  It has become something that I check daily, curious to see how Matt & his daughter are doing.  I knew just how much it affected me when I recently saw a robot (something frequently mentioned in the blog) necklace and thought of the blog or when I was at Amoeba today and again thought of the blog.  Yes, this is weird because I don't know them, but I can't help but to find myself really rooting for them and as he writes about days that are less painful, it brings a smile to my face.  

This whole story has got me thinking again about how important a father's role is in their child's life.  I'm sure Matt couldn't possibly imagine doing anything less for his daughter than he's doing now.   And I'm sure that Matt doesn't really think of himself as a "hero" per se, but just being a good father and being the kind of father that would make his wife and daughter proud.  A good father is rare these days it seems and his blog just reminds me how great a father Matt is to his baby girl and it brings tears to my eyes.  Dads, take note and Liz...you were a very lucky lady (though I can bet that Matt and all of your friends & family thought they were the lucky ones for having known you).

Is it really bizarre for me to write all of this?  See, this is why having this blog is self-indulgent.  Anyone who reads this entry though...please do visit Matt's blog, its some of the best writing I've read in ages...and it will forever affect your heart.

DAYS OF PLENTY

Days of Plenty
Music by Jason Howland; Lyrics by Mindi Dickstein
(from Little Women the Musical)

I never dreamed of this sorrow,
I never thought I'd have reason to lament,
I hoped I'd never know heartbreak,
How I wish I could change the way things went!
I wanted nothing but goodness,
I wanted reason to prevail,
Not this bare emptyness.
I wanted Days of Plenty.

But I refused to feel tragic,
I am aching for more than pain and grief.
There has got to be meaning,
Most of all when a life has been so brief.
I have got to learn something,
How can I give her any less?
I want life to go on.
I want Days of Plenty

You have to believe,
There is reason for hope.
You have to believe 
That the answers will come.
You can't let this defeat you.
I won't less this defeat you.
You must fight to keep her there,
Within you!

So believe that she matters!
And believe that she always will!
She will always be with you!
She'll be part of the days you've yet to feel!
She will live in your bounty!
She will live as you carry on your life!

So carry on,
Full of hope,
She'll be there,

For all your days of plenty

ASTONISHING

Maybe the reason I loved Little Women the Musical is because I can really relate to Jo. Of course the reason this story -- from the novel to the many films and the musical even -- is so popular is because many little girls can relate to her energy and drive.

When I was a little girl, like Jo, I wanted to be a writer -- this was one of my first goals and dreams. Laura Ingalls Wilder was my inspiration and I believed that one day, I would write great stories. I believed my life would be one I could only dream of, so in the meantime, I would write about it. I wrote things from scripts to "teen serials" (a la The Babysitter's Club/Sweet Valley High) to sequels of my favorite book (Beaches) to the life that I wanted to live with the people I wanted in it. I wasn't willing to settle for anything less than my dreams. Nobody would convince me otherwise and like Jo, I knew that "I'm meant for something more" And somehow, I had to know.

And while I always held my dreams -- no matter how many times they were thrown or seemingly dashed -- I never forgot what it was that I had to do with myself...until I experienced devistating loss -- Papo and Mamo's deaths.

So I know how Jo felt when she lost Beth. I know the pain, the confusion, feeling like giving up...trying to find meaning in what happened and then realizing that by giving up, I am giving up on those who loved me and who I lost...and that I couldn't allow my dreams to die with them. Life certainly goes on...and though it is sometimes hard to accept, it must.

I guess I should really re-read the story again.

WHEN HE LOVED ME

I can't stop listening to the Oscar Nominated song, "When He Loved Me" by Randy Newman from Toy Story 2. I'd like to think that Miss Cookie felt this way about me:

When somebody loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour spent together
Lives within my heart
And when she was sad
I was there to dry her tears
And when she was happy, so was I
When she loved me

Through the summer and the fall
We had each other
That was all
Just she and I together
Like it was meant to be
And when she was lonely
I was there to comfort her
And I knew that she loved me.

STOP, WAIT, PLEASE

Today, January 7th, the curtain will permenantly go down on one of LA's performing arts fixtures - the Shubert Theater in Century City (see August 28th post). On a personal note, it was at the Shubert where I began my love affair with musical theater. I've seen so many shows there - it's so hard for me to imagine it gone. I could understand if the theater were being torn down to make way for another theater, but it's being demolished for office buildings of all things. There are plenty of vacant lots and strip malls where office buildings can be built, but why demolish the Shubert? The Shubert was one of three large houses in LA - The Music Center, the Pantages and the Shubert, which will soon be history. I always imagined going back to all three venues with my child and introducing them to the performing arts as my parents had. By the time I have a family, I hope the other two will still be around.

The Shubert and Pantages Theaters were such pivotal figures in my growing-up process. I was introduced to theater in those venues. I saw Annie (at both those theaters I think) which was a show that seriously changed my life. I can't even imagine what my life would be like had I not been exposed to theater during that time...it made such a lasting impression on me. I literally fell in love with performing arts when I saw that show. I wanted to sing, dance, act...I knew if I could be involved in entertainment when I "grew up" I'd be happy. From that moment on, I've spent my entire life making sure I would do just that.

I can't believe the Shubert will soon be a distant memory! Growing up in Southern California, my opportunities to see theater were at the OCPAC, The Music Center AND the Shubert! Boo hoo. :(

How sad. :(

LOS ANGELES, Aug 27 (Reuters) -- The Shubert, the 1,800-seat Los Angeles theater that was home to such hits as "Cats," Sunset Boulevard" and "Les Miserables," will be razed to make way for a new $280 million office building, the Los Angeles Business Journal reported Monday.

The theater will be torn down as part of the planned demolition of the ABC Entertainment Center in Century City, the paper said. A spokesman for the Shubert Organization, which operated the theater since 1972, was not available to comment.

But in a statement to the Journal, Shubert spokesman Lee Silver said, "The Shubert Organization is saddened and disappointed the ownership of the ABC Entertainment Center has decided to replace the existing complex with a new office building." Under the plan, the theater would cease operations on Sept. 30, 2002.

The theater has been the home for such musicals as "Evita," "Annie" and "City of Angels." The last major production was "Ragtime," which closed in spring of 1998 to go to Broadway.

A year later, the Shubert lost a bid to mount "The Lion King," which is still running at the Pantages in Hollywood.

The Shubert, meanwhile, returned to subscription sales and has hosted "Mamma Mia," "Dame Edna: The Royal Tour," "Saturday Night Fever" and "Kiss Me, Kate," which is currently running."

The complex includes the theater, two five-story office buildings and a limestone plaza and fountains.

Officials for the Trammell Crow Co., which will build the new structure, said brokerage house Bear Sterns & Co. is considering becoming a major tenant of the new building.