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Wednesday, January 10, 2007

COULD YOU?

What (not who) do you really love? What was the last thing you did for yourself that brought you an overwhelming sense of joy? The last thing I did for myself (and sadly it was awhile ago) that filled me heart & soul was my trip to New York with Tianyi. It was a trip that was years overdue and will always be something that I will look back on fondly. It was a trip filled with shopping, eating and enjoying Broadway shows (did I mention this was also a business trip for myself? Haha, it was, but felt like more of a vacation in some ways). Of course some of why I loved the trip had to do with the city I love, the places we visited and the person I was with, but a huge part of it had to do with all of the musical theatre we indulged in.

I love music and more specifically musical theatre. This obviously is not a huge revelation to anyone who has read this blog (even once). Musical theatre is my first love and is what I’ve wanted to be involved with off and on for the last 25+ years and more seriously in the last decade. In some ways, I defined myself by my passion for this art-form and was happiest when I was in a theatre (working in it or as an audience member). Theatre has encouraged me to dream, flooded me with emotion (both good and bad) and has been what has inspired me everyday. I’ve said it before, but musical theatre is what has made me who I am today…which is why seeing Little Women: The Musical really spoke to me. The lyrics (below) described exactly the fire I had to make a difference (in theatre, maybe?). The realization of this"astonishing" feeling has to do with personal fulfillment and maybe it has nothing to do with a professional accomplishment.

There's a life that I am meant to lead,
Alive like nothing I have ever known.
I can feel it and it's far from here.
I've got to find it on my own.
Even now I feel its heat upon my skin:
A life of passion that
Pulls me from within.
A life that I am aching to begin.
There must be somewhere I can be
Astonishing..."

Sometimes doing the very thing you want/need/have to do doesn’t give you all the results you want, but if you do what you know in your heart is the right thing, in the end, could it really be wrong?

3 comments:

Tianyi Wang said...

I have three thoughts on this post.
1. I love you!
2. If you save $150 every month from now to May (that's 50 less Starbucks a month). We can paint New York red again when I go again in May.
3. It's wonderful that you recognize that you are meant to do something astonishing.Though I already think you're astonishing, the question is... be it in theatre or what not, what will you actively do or even sacrifice to get to the point where you finally believe you are astonishing?

Tianyi Wang said...

quxgbtgFourth thought...
There will ALWAYS be a risk factor. You've got to love the process and buckle up for the ride.

chizi said...

I love you too! I think I need to remind myself to follow the the right things/choices, not the ones that will involve the least amount of risk. If you start out doing something you know is second best for yourself, sooner or later you'll realize that, right?

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